The Winterfood Diaries

The Winterfood Diaries

Thursday, 14 June 1990

Goodbye, NORCAT

12.30pm

THE DRAMA STUDIO, NORCAT



‘Pop Song’ – David Sylvian

Here I am, reminding myself of a similar situation two years ago.

Time to go.

I can’t stay here any longer; it hurts too much inside.  It really DOES hurt; to see DPA 2 fall like a doomed beast, to watch it fall and die this slow, unenviable death.  This has been a pathetic climax to those halcyon days.  We were SO productive, once.

This studio is a mess again; cluttered with blocks, chairs and junk.  The carpet’s gone now, you know.  What a mess.  Tired and dead.  Not fit for use any more.

Time to go.

I spent the morning in town with Donny GoodfellowHOB NOBS was okay; I just felt the impending anti-climax looming somewhat.

I went to visit TEST OF COMPASSION writer, Martin, and he’s doing really well with his script-writing.


In College, I was pleased when Jonny and Missy came in, but then they asked Kirby, Amy and Donny if they wanted to join them in Barnes Bysea for the day and off they all went, knowing full well they were leaving me behind – alone. 

THAT HURT.


‘Instant Karma’ – Dave Stewart

I said ‘bye’ to Leo and Cheryl; they don’t know it was for the last time, but it probably wouldn’t bother them anyway.  I won’t see Cheryl ever again.




I also said goodbye to Sally Watson.


So many more people to give warm regards to, but it’s too late; I’m going.  And if I am to be resolute about leaving this place where I learnt and felt and grew so much, then I must go and go right now.

I MUST NEVER LOOK BACK.


Goodbye, Drama Studio.
Goodbye, BTEC and DPA.
Goodbye, education.
Goodbye, training.
You’ll never see me again as this silly little man.


Today’s word is ‘ERA’.  I could put it into context for you, but I don’t think I could face such a cliché right now.

Later:

My No.1: ‘The Only Rhyme That Bites’ by MC Tunes VS 808 State

Larry Goodgirl rang me tonight, telling me that he may have a few weeks’ tutoring work for me in July and some Assistant Director work at the end of August.  He says there’s also work for Donna Davidson.

But is he messing us about?  He’s very hard to trust these days.  Not a charlatan, just unreliable.  Mr Williams (our Head of Sector at college) said Larry didn’t provide enough information to the Examiner, and it’s been rumoured that the Examiner may knock down our marks as a consequence.  FUCK!  Williams says it’s all Goodgirl’s fault and Goodgirl says it’s all Williams’ fault.  WHAT A BLOODY COCK-UP!


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Next time: ‘The Beginning…’

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