The Winterfood Diaries

The Winterfood Diaries

Thursday, 13 October 1988

Big Fun In London

My No.1: ‘Rok Da House’ – The Beatmasters featuring Cookie Crew


As the day began, the Drama Department was partying its pants off at Simon Lewis’s place.


Once it was over, we all set up our quilts on the living room floor.  The girls kept asking me to show them my penis for some reason, and I was happy to oblige as they were ALL quite happy to get a good look at it – esp. Donna Davidson (alias Lady Macbeth) from my BTEC group.


I met Donna on the first day when she told me she liked my toe-capped Cuban-heeled boots, and after a bit of a stilted start, we are becoming really good chums.  I feel very close to her.


Anyway, this kicked off a departmental STIFF WILLY competition, and I’ll tell you this: I saw a new side to a great many people this morning.  All the assumptions I’ve made about everybody since this term started have gone right out of the window!


Oh, and Donna Davidson told me that I had revealed to her that I would ‘bonk’ every girl in our group (meaning: Kat, Jodie, Lee-Anne, Jolene, Tracey, Sharon and Trudy – and yes, I expect I would!).  I also kissed her quite passionately, mid-conversation, for no adequate reason.  Now, I DON’T REMEMBER DOING THAT, but most people vouch that I actually DID.  Great.  Donna’s lovely, but I don’t think she’s actually someone I actively fancy.  She’s just not my type.  I am an odd boy.


We went to bed at 6am-ish, and I slept snuggled up to Lee-Anne Jones, but in the ‘night’, I awoke on top of all those under the adjoined quilts.  How had that happened?  I don’t know.


‘Burning Down the House’ – Talking Heads


By about 7.30am, I had to resurface.  I was extremely ill.  My head was in tremendous pain and my stomach was churning.  I fell around a bit and finally collapsed in the bathroom, retching up thick, slimy vodka.  The liquid was interspersed with small orange bits.  I undressed and lay in a full bath, my stomach pulling in on itself and making me feel like I was a famine victim undergoing malnutrition.  I fell asleep in the bath, only to awake and vomit further, feeling as rough as I’ve ever felt from the effects of DRINK.


Sadly for me, it was time for us all to leave and get to College. 





A Larry Goodgirl type, spitting…


Someone in a baseball cap doesn’t even flicker as their jaw explodes…


Organic circuitry, matrixing and growing…


‘Don’t Worry, Be Happy’ – Bobby McFerrin


I met Danny in the Common Room and we boarded the bus trip to LONDON with all the College Folks of Drama, etc.  And on the way, I fell asleep, feeling like I had the Devil in my mouth.


I awoke, some time later, just outside LONDON and drank some cups of gorgeous bus tea.  Feeling a little better, I ‘worked the room’, talking with Josh Wilde, Marco, Carl Morris, my new good friend Donna Davidson and Scarlett (our Dance teacher), before finally indulging in some Doctor Who chat with Danny and Julian.  I haven’t seen Part Two of Remembrance Of The Daleks yet, but they were both impressed.


In LONDON, Danny and I went round together, and spent all our time around TOTTENHAM COURT ROAD, LEICESTER SQUARE, OXFORD STREET, NEW OXFORD STREET + BOND STREET.


‘I Want You Back’ – Bananarama


We spent ages in book shops down one street, went to small HMV, and Leicester Square Athena, where I purchased, after a search of almost 6 years, Bert Stern’s The Last Sitting – a book of ‘nude’ Marilyn Monroe photos from just before she died.  And it was at a gorgeous half price. 

Wandering around, I also purchased, from various street-side stalls, three Marilyn postcards (a sepia portrait, and the movie posters to Niagara and How To Marry A Millionaire).  I also purchased a big B+W picture.


We then ate in QUICK BURGER, before catching a tube and walking by the Astoria and W1 BURGER (Ahh!  Memories!).  We then found an ACID HOUSE shop called MASH.  I blew my top cos it was so groovy and I got a great smiley badge and some other bits.  We also wandered around VIRGIN MEGASTORE and FORBIDDEN PLANET, which was skill – and I LOVE ELVIRA, THE L.A. VAMPIRE. 

In F.P., I bought the new The Prisoner comic from DC (serialising a sequel to the show) and it’s a bombafook gadd laghe.


‘Let’s Pick Up The Pieces (And Make Some Music) (8 Minutes Would’ve Bin Shatterin’ Mix)’ – Twin-Beat


Danny and I then realised it was time to get back to THE BARBICAN CENTRE + meet the bus.  So we tubed it.  Even though we didn’t realise it, we got on the wrong tube, but thankfully, by a twist of fate, we saw Lee-Anne Jones + Davina Ellis sitting on the tube train opposite us, mouthing ‘You’re going the wrong way’.  I literally noticed them in a split second, grabbed Danny, and quickly pulled him from the train.  We rapidly boarded the next correct one. 


King’s Cross must have been hell during the fire.


‘Julia’ – The Beatles


The bus journey home was splendid.  I sat talking to Scarlett (our Dance teacher) and we got on really well.  The bus driver was cool, also; he let us hold an ‘acid’/ ‘dance’/ ‘house’ party on the coach, which was GROOVEBOMMAFOOHK!


This evening, Josh and I stayed at Simon Lewis’s place.  I read some books and we listened to Josh’s New Age cassette.



[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on that precede it]


Next time: ‘The Romans…’

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