The Winterfood Diaries

The Winterfood Diaries

Saturday, 26 March 1988

City Three


12.10am.

 

A TALE OF THREE CITIES, PART THREE: LONDON

 

‘Ant Rap’ – Adam And The Ants



 

Chip’s really ill.  Bad cough.  I hope he’s okay.

 

Things to do later today:

Polish boots

Do hair

Tidy room

Go to Stan’s

Poo on Jack

 

Later:

 

‘Doctorin’ The House’ – Coldcut



 

At 9.30am, I arose from a very sleepless night and did my household chores.  Then I had breakfast and started doing my hair, concocting my make-up and getting dressed.

 

At 1.30pm, I was given a lift into Wisbech, where I visited Lucille, who was able to (thankfully) repair my bootstrap.  I then bussed it to King’s Lynn (quite needlessly it turned out), where I saw Suz, who told me Justine was not going to be going to London because she’s ill with Chicken Pox.

 

I waited at the bus station until Stan eventually arrived.

 

At 3.10pm, the bus set off (with 10 from King’s Lynn, 3 from Wisbech and about 7 from Peterborough).  Stan and I had two girls to sit with and talk to on the way.

 

Who?

 

Nat and Sandy who had been at Stan’s 18th Birthday party in February.  Now, I’d never really bothered with these two at the party, other than some chit-chat, but we all got on really acely and t’were a laugh travelling down with them. 

 

On the journey, Stan and I got very weelehed on lager, and he skinned up a very nice ‘funny fagarette’.  Ooh, Buses, Booze ‘n’ Drugs ‘n’ Rock ‘n’ Roll.  Ace, eh?  ACE!  ACE!  ACE!

 

I tell thee what, ‘n’ all: it’s raight hard trying to use a bus bog.  You get thrown all o’er’t’ shop and so does your wee.  NO LEEZ I TELL THA!

 

We all had a great time + I felt extremely close to Nat.

 

At about 5.30pm, the remazing bus arrived on London’s Charing Cross Road.  All over the place there were Rockers, Goths, Punks, Anarchos, Grebs and Alternatives.  But the doors of the ASTORIA THEATRE weren’t to open until 7pm, so Stan, Sandy, Nat and I went to a place called W1 BURGER and ate burgers ‘n’ drank tea.  Then we went and sat by the fountain near Centre Point, getting even more weelehed.  And a JAPANESE TOURIST TUCK MY FORTOR!

 

I now realised I was attracted to this Nat girl in a way I’d never imagined I could be at Stan’s 18th.

 

What’s she look like?

 

She’s just shorter than me, with blonde/brown-ish hair, which is just over shoulder length.  She has nice eyes, a prominent, noble type of nose (just the sort I love) and nice teeth which always seem to be smiling.  Ideal.  Just ideal.

 

She wears a long grey mac, long crush velvet tops, beads, short black leggings and Japanese slippers.

 

‘No Memory’ – Scarlet Fantastic



 

At 7pm, the doors opened, and as Nat and Sandy went inside, Stan and I went to find out what the chances of getting backstage were.  I knew they’d be impossible in such a venue and, indeed, the bouncer said it would be impossible, but ‘the bands normally hang out after a show in the KEITH MOON bar, depending on how well they play.’ 

 

So, Stan and I decided to head inside, but were halted by cries of, ‘Jez!  Jez!’  It was Crackle and Rae from Newcastle!  HACE!  They were here – at last! – and we all talked for quite a while before going in. 

 

Once in, Stan and I checked the place out and got a few drinks.

 

At 8.30pm, on came GHOST DANCE and they were really good.  Anne Marie was gorgeous, but Gary Marx (ex-Sisters) looked really crappo.  Sadly, I couldn’t appreciate them to the full, as I was, by now, feeling really sick and ill (with the booze).  But it was a good set.  WELL HACE!

 

Following GHOST DANCE, Stan and I drank some more (!), meeting up with Crackle and Rae in the KEITH MOON.  It was here that we spied many a thing: Craig Adams’ girlfriend boozing it up; Gary Marx having a drink just in front of us; the SOUP DRAGONS (twatso music, or what?) boozing it up; all the Eskimos; and Danny from SALVATION (HACE!  HACE!  HACE!).

 

Crackle and Rae and me ‘n’ Stan all chatted to each other for ages, then the girls went up to the Balcony and Stan went down into the front of the crowd.  I stayed in the KEITH MOON feeling really sick!

 

At 9.30pm, THE MISSION came on and by now Stan (along with Sandy and Nat) had plunged into the pulsating mass of lumpy people at the front of the stage.  I was still feeling ill, and when The Mish did ‘Beyond The Pale’ I certainly felt it.  I tried to enjoy it, but it was getting harder and harder to contain myself.  ‘And The Dance Goes On’ made me want to Razz – and not just because it’s boring.  So I decided to leave the crush, go to the bogs, and make myself voluntarily sick.

 

‘And The Dance Goes On’ – The Mission



 

Being in the bogs (under the dance floor) was like being at sea on a ship, so I felt even sicker.  Try as I might, though, I just couldn’t make myself actually be physically sick.  I wanted to be sick, because I felt sick and reasoned that it’d be a lot better (and easier) to get it over and done with now, rather than bowking all o’er Stan later on.  Anyway, whatever I did, worked – even though I didn’t puke.  I just gipped a lot, but ended up feeling tonnes better for it.

 

So, feeling re-invigorated, I returned to the auditorium.  Standing on the sidelines, I got a bloody HACE view of THE MISSION.  Here, I bumped into Nat, who was alone, having had to leave the front due to being inadvertently elbowed in the nose by a very fat MISSIONARY. 

 

She stood just in front of me, and we watched the band, dancing gently and rhythmically to the music, body to body, gently grinding against each other.  It was, unintentionally, very sexual, but we’d say a few ‘tension-defusing’ words to each other now and again, before carrying on with this grinding dance.  I felt so addicted to her.  I wanted more, even though our bodies were virtually one.  It felt like our minds were probing.

 

Meanwhile, to my rear, a young girl danced close to my back, caressing my thigh with her fingers in what could only be intentional ways.  And, much later, she kept playing with my hair, which was at its best ever. 

 

‘AGAIN?’ you ask

 

‘Yes’, say I.

 

Well, it only proves that I’m getting better at it.

 

With two encores, THE MISSION show was fabulous.  The best time I’ve seen them.  Hussey was really alive, really animated.  Simon was excellent.  Craig Adams is a crap singer, though.  I didn’t see much of Mick Brown.  But it was a really enjoyable set.  I was sad when it finished.

 

‘Royal Orleans’ – Led Zeppelin



 

At 11pm, I said farewell to Sandy and Nat, then rejoined Stan, Crackle and Rae in the KEITH MOON, hoping to get a glimpse of THE MISSION or Anne Marie.  But there was no sign.  Nor was there to be, and as things progressed, the place slowly emptied of its Ultra-Goth/Greb set, to be replaced by awfully dressed ‘70s style House ‘funkers’ (who were holding a House party/disco) in flares and suchlike.  Awful clothes.  Awful.  So, Stan and I attended our first ACID HOUSE PARTY, which was great, but the fashions were gross.  If this is where House is going, then count me out, please!  I enjoyed the music, though J

 




 

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

 

Next time: ‘Escalator…’

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