The Winterfood Diaries

The Winterfood Diaries

Friday, 18 December 1987

Wankenstein


8.10pm.

 

‘Street Fighting Man’ – The Rolling Stones



 

NO SLEEP TILL WISBECH presents:

 

Ritcherd Winterfood

In

 

JEZZE JAMES MEETS WANKENSTEIN’S DONKER

 

A double feature with

Nyall Watson

In

 

DOC CROW VS. DRACULAAARDOO!

 

FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE OF LOST PERSONAE…

 

‘Hey, gringo.  I jus’ done seen Jezzy Oakley at the Saloon.  She’s raisin’ hell.  ‘N’ Satan aint’t too pleased.  He gonna six-six-six-shoot the hell out y’all.  Watch out.  He done transmogrified Jezzy.  Which means Jezze James De Carlo, Servant of Satan’s back.  Out to get y’all.  Watch out, Cowboys.  He ain’t too pleased wid y’all an your derogatory comments.  He’s carryin’ a grudge.  ‘Specially ‘gainst the Babie Sleaze Brothers.  Hell’s shootin’ outta his weapon.  All you cowboys are gonna find life a little tougher than it’s been.  Y’all get that?  He only spare one of ya.  He done gonna spare Doc Crow.  But only cos he got a surprise.  Sumthin’ better up his canvas sleeves.  So git down.  Get cool, Cowboys.  Your days is numbered.  Spook City’s grown teeth and they gonna eat y’all for brunch.  And spit out the bones.  Now, g’night, and don’t fergit to put the Twat out…’

 

‘Adios…’

 

Last Chance Down at the Saloon

 

A huge cowboy hat, a long duster coat, Cuban heels and winkle pickers; blue-black hair spiked out all over the place…

 

Six Shoot Yo Ass… Fucka!

 

Doc Crow with his crooked hat and Gonzo eyes, holds up his bullet-proof poncho in protection…

 

P’TING!  T’PAU!

 

Jez De Carlo.  Return…

 

‘She’s On It’ – The Beastie Boys



 

Had a laugh or ten at Nyall’s.

 

So who stayed at WATSON VEELAHZE?

These: Jez De Carlo, Doc Crow (Nyall), Roger, Suz and Luggage.

 

And everybody DOES love Suz, much!  Mrs Watson hates her, coming out with statements like, ‘Roger always was fond of dogs’, and ‘Suz’s such a pig, she just ate 13 Pot Noodles’…

 

I came home today. 

 

Hey-Ho!  Here I am…

 

 

 

Lately, I’ve been spending time at home, listening to crap and looking after Chip in shifts with Betty.

 

Naomi rang while I was out.  She’s got my letter and I’m to meet her betwixt 12pm ‘n’ 1pm in NOO-RETCH tomorrow.  Oooh.

 

So, me ‘n’ Nyall is off to NOO-RETCH.  I hope Anastasia goes with him.  So does he.  We wait tentatively for her to ring him…

 

So.  Ritcherd meets Naomi.  3 months on.  We’ll see if this is the ‘twilight of a champion’ or not.  Tomorrow’ll tell.  I get this feeling, anyhow…

 

ITEM!  Paul got in touch.  1st time in yonks.  Strange bloke.

ITEM!  Rang Gran Winterfood for rest of money, so as to buy pressies.

ITEM!  Swapped my BR coat with Flash for bigger black coat.  Farewell BR.

 

I’M FED EP NARR…

 



 

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context.  Never forget: no man is an island.  If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1  July  2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

 

Next time: ‘Burger Me!’

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