‘We Struggle’ – Getting the Fear
11 days to go!!!
Yes. I should be at Tech. I just missed my bus this morning. Just! So I had to doss around. Therefore, I went and stood outside the Grammar School and I saw Hannah! I was dead pleased, but I felt very self-conscious and extra spotty + jyp, etc. In my opinion, she was acting as if she didn’t know me all that well because she was with a friend.
BMW zoomed past on her bike. Didn’t acknowledge my existence. I’m still fond of her.
So here I am. Home! The Angles tonaight. Hope Hannah reads the note I put in her cassette box about liking her very much. Why am I so attracted?
'Incantation' - David Sylvian
I’m also raight pissed off, as I should be at Tech. And I want to be, as today is the dress rehearsal for Plop the Owl, which is to be performed next Wednesday. YAK!
So. Now it is approx 10.10pm, and here I sit in my doom-laden bedroom, listening to that purveyor of excellent taste (except when he plays ‘Hip Hop’), John Peel.
I went to the Angles, and right now I’m not sure how I feel exactly. We did some rather interesting practical work, but I hardly said a word to Hannah. And when I did, I asked her if she’d be in Wisbech on Saturday. She said she was afraid she’ll be in Peterborough. True or false? Was she just trying to shrug me off? Actually, I shouldn’t try to take our friendship too far.
Later on, Stan Flowers told me he can’t make it to the Party. SHIT!!! I told you. It’ll be just me. If I’m lucky!!!
In a one-to-one, head-to-head, heart-to-heart with Tina Montgomery, I poured out all my problems; parental, scholarly and social. She understood me and said she was always ready to help. I’m going to hers for tea again next Tuesday.
On reaching my parents’ car, ten minutes late (!), I was subjected to exactly the ritual humiliation Tina and I had been chatting about.
By the way, I think I’m going to drop Political Shitstory! Also, my TS group will hate me 4 not turning up today. TOUGH! T’weren’t my fault.
Oh! No! Peely’s playing a reggae record. Poor man!
I heard The Jesus and Mary Chain do a new song called ‘Fall’ in session on the John Peel programme tonight. I’ve liked the Chain for ages, so I was well chuffed to hear it. It just struck me as a brilliant, powerful record. I love it. It’s strong.
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NEXT TIME: ‘Wendy…’
With love to the memory of the late great Anita Kitchener