The Winterfood Diaries

The Winterfood Diaries

Tuesday, 29 October 1985

Toilet Attendant

‘Trapped’ – Colonel Abrams

Today, I took the piss out of Cheggers and fat-chinned, spotty Jabba. Well? What is life for, I ask you?

Mr Locke, the Head of Maths is fed up of me because I’m in the top Year Group but I’m not working hard enough. I don’t think that’s my fault – I’m only in the top group because I’m good at English. I know I’m no good at Maths. I find it really difficult. Locke says I think I can ‘sail through’ my Maths O-level just because I’ve got my English O-level. He’s wrong. I resent that English O-level because it puts me in Maths Group 1! Twat! I’m no good at Maths! He says I’m going to be a toilet attendant when I grow up. Bastardizer!

This time 8 years ago:

‘I watched Doctor Who: Image Of The Fendahl (Part One).

This time last year:

‘As Mum and George have gone to Pontefract, I decided to take the day off school. I ate some cheese crackers from downstairs and rang Gran and Granddad Winterfood.’

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on that precede it]

No comments:

Post a Comment