Dwelf

‘Long Live The Halflings’ – Stephen Oliver

Today, I saw a little of Fergie and she’s a great talker.  We have so much in common and get along really well.  One major talking point was the eye contact we had been having for a while (our ‘early days’!).  Seems we were both fully aware of what we were doing.  And I’m glad she talks a lot.  It’s just as well because very often I seem to dry up with very little to say.  But sometimes when our conversation lulls, I always make great efforts to struggling hard and help revive it.  Not because I’m uncomfortable, but to continue enjoying something I think is great.  She says she feels the same.

I gave her a small gift: a cast-iron dwarf/elf thing I’ve had about my room for a while.  She loves it and has called it Dwelf.  I’ve been talking a lot about the Tolkien books I’ve been reading lately.  I hope she doesn’t mind.  She seems interested anyway.

‘Ken’ – Kate Bush

Danny Chegwin is going on a course for the whole of next week and this has made Sandra depressed.  I think Fergie also felt quite down too when I told her I was going up to Leeds.

She smells nice, looks nice and… Well, she is nice!  She’s so great and, although I’m not really considering any eventualities (I’m only really considering the here, the now and the friendship), I think, yes!  I would love a relationship with her.  But I’m not truly sure it would ever happen.

But today was lovely, and she’s just excellent.

And another thing.  I never actually realised before today that Fergie’s good friend Mike is in fact the brother of Sasha Cummings.  Remember her?  She was a colleague from my old TS group.  Well, she came into college today and we chatted, though very briefly.

Later:

‘The Prisoner’ – Ron Grainer

I may have a job/Equity card opportunity lined up for when I leave college – if I’m lucky and things go according to plan.  I’m trying not to think about it or pin too many hopes on it as it may not even happen.

Today, I should have gone to the College’s Finance Office to give the proof they need of my letter to Cambs. County Council.  I forgot.  Oh dear.

I wish Chloe Attenborough wouldn’t keep avoiding me.

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1989

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1991

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘Watching lots of Doctor Who…’

Ken Shabby's Testicle Oppression

2.30pm

My No.1: ‘Enjoy the Silence’ by Depeche Mode

I asked Fergie’s friend Shelley what Fergie thinks of me and, apparently, she really likes me.  But as Shelley says, what can she really do about someone new suddenly coming along if she’s been with Mickey for 3 months? 

Fair enough.

A girl called Charlotte at Tech is getting me Lilith Valentine’s address, so she tells me.  Do I want it, though?  Perhaps it’s just best to let it/us/her and Nick be?

Sooty, our cat of the last 14 years, has a mouth infection + is suffering greatly.

I feel perhaps he should be put to sleep.  I don’t want him enduring this disgusting suffering and pain.  It’s making him smell so very bad, but I do love him.

Later:

‘Bilbo’s Last Song’ – Stephen Oliver

I watched The Comic Strip Presents: Spaghetti Hoops and it was great.

Jonny, quite humorously, has been continually delving into Fergie’s past (via his friends) for me.  Even though I never asked him to.

LOOT is good, but TEST OF COMPASSION (now dubbed Testicle Oppression) isn’t.  Director, Kenneth Farnham now has a new nickname in addition to ‘Ken Shabby’ and ‘Bill Trumpton’.  He’s now also known as ‘Willy Crumptham’.  Why?  I dunno…

I can’t stand Donna Davidson this week.

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1989

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1994

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘Dwelf…’

Cartoon Boyfriend

11.15am at TEXAS HOMECARE CAR PARK

‘Running Up That Hill (12-inch Mix)’ – Kate Bush

Hi, I’m in Jonny’s Cavalier.  He and Will have gone to collect some nuts and bolts, etc. for the Loot set.

Today, I saw Fergie first thing.  She came to talk to me and we chatted at length.  And then again at break.  And what’s her favourite music?  KATE BUSH.  Now that’s brilliant.  Aside from the brilliance, though, I did feel I was getting a bit too ‘forceful’ in conversation.  But we’ll see.  I have hopes.

The Situation are good. 

I’ve been listening to our old tapes.  Stuff I’ve enjoyed has been: TAPED PLASTIC and PSYCHOTIC PINEAPPLE, mainly.

I don’t actually own that many, but it’s good.

I want to mix my (provisionally titled) Scotch Mist tape with some of our early stuff.  I’ve really got to do it soon.  I reckon if we do any more tapes aside from that in ’90, then we should do a single and also re-record WHAT THE DICKENS?! or CITIZEN DERRICK.

Later:

‘Please Give Me Something’ – Gallon Drunk

I met Fergie again, eventually, at 12pm.  She was with Shelley and Sandra and we chatted non-stop for about three hours until the others finally left us alone.  She is ARIES and, I believe, she used to be a bit Christian (Catholic?).  She’s been with Mickey for 3 months, but lately they’ve hit a ‘rocky’ patch; they’ve been crying down the ‘phone at each other for weeks.  She’s nearly 17 and lives in Heacham with her parents who are very strict over her.  We get on really well, despite the fact that Amy Neat has given her the impression that I am a bit callous.  Fergie and I spoke about this very carefully and at great length.  We also talked about Tolkien’s runic letters.

By 3pm-ish, we were still talking away, when in walked Mickey, whom she was supposed to be meeting.  She hadn’t – obviously – because she’d been too engrossed in conversation with me.

Mickey is well ‘aware’ of me; likes my biker’s jacket and the Watchmen painting on the back.  He ‘likes’ me, apparently (Fergie wants us to meet properly and ‘get on’).  He possibly also considers me a threat as she’s told him everything about me and how much I like her. 

How do I feel about that?!

Anyway.  They went at about 3.10pm, leaving me feeling … ‘angry’?

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1989

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1986

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘Ken Shabby…’

The Last Dance

‘The Model’ – Big Black

Today was a step in the right direction.

I said hello to Mary-Jane Ferguson in the morning, shortly after which she came to me and asked me if Danny Chegwin had rung me.  I told her he hadn't and that she ought to nag Sandra and he to organise some ‘outing’ or other.

After a few lessons I saw her around with Mickey and said nothing.

Jonny tells me that no one at KES likes Mickey because he’s sarcastic and always slags people off.

‘Possession’ – Sisters of Mercy

Later, at lunch, Daryl came to talk to Jonny and then Mary-Jane joined us, so I talked with her.

She says she likes to be known by her nickname, Fergie.  She’s re-doing GCSE’s in Art, Ceramics and Photography.  She may well even come back next year to do the BTEC Performing Arts course.  Her ideal career would be being a singer.  I find that very thrilling and very pleasing; inspiring.  She swears like a trooper, but is also thrillingly articulate. 

She tells me that Mickey has few friends and is – in her own words – ‘a twat’.  She also knows loads of Jonny’s former KES friends, and we spoke of the days when her brother and Danny Black were really good friends.  Luggage was also mentioned as a mutual acquaintance.

She tells me she stays in most evenings.  She still lives with her parents who allow her out one night a week – which she usually takes to go to the Wenns bar and LA’s with Mickey.  To earn money, she has a job baby-sitting.

She says she has known of me and acknowledged my presence around the place for quite some time.

Anyway, Jonny and I eventually had to say goodbye and go to our last Dance lesson ever as Scarlett Kane leaves at the weekend for a new job.

At break, Fergie was with Mickey and I felt so ‘bitter’, so ‘angered’ (?).  But hey, he’s got his rights, hasn’t he?  I suppose.

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1992

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1986

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘Getting to know Fergie…’

Fergie and Cheggers

THE COLLEGE THEATRE (NORCAT), BACKSTAGE (LEFT)

11.20am

‘Ocean Size’ – Jane’s Addiction

I got into College, sat on the steps with Danny and Astra, and then Mary-Jane walked by.  She turned, looked up, and smiled at me.  I smiled back, of course.  I can only interpret her smile to me as a positive and encouraging sign.  I do hope so.

In the Common Room, I sat looking over at her occasionally.  She was with the blonde girl who I’m assuming goes out with my old school buddy Danny Chegwin.  Her name’s Sandra, I believe.  Add her to my list of favourite people.  Despite my looking over, Mary-Jane didn’t give me much feedback.  As she left – to go to the 3^rd floor – so did I (I had a lesson) and I was walking along about two steps behind her, a bit unsure and a bit embarrassed.  She held the door for me and said ‘Bye.’  I replied, ‘Bye’ in a hoarse, choked and slightly pathetic squeak of a voice.  And that was that.

‘Forth Rode The King’ – Stephen Oliver

In the Common Room at break, we shared a few meagre glances – not much at all.  I hope we haven’t reached some kind of ‘lull’ stage.  I want to do something now; talk to her?  But how does one approach that problem?  What could I start talking to her about?  What can I feasibly do next without being laughed at?

I talked to Kat about it, because we’ve been through this stuff together.  I don’t want to attempt ‘stepping in’ behind Mickey’s back, either just at present or at all.  It would only complicate things in the future.  And I don’t want a complicated life.  Anyway, I’ve learnt all my lessons in that department.  I’d rather Mickey was out of the way properly before I allowed anything to develop, but it’s all a bit Catch 22.  Or something.  By which I mean he probably won’t really be out of the way unless I actually do instigate something.  And, in a sense, she’s handed me an ultimatum, hasn’t she?

Should I talk further with Daryl about it?  Can I even trust what Daryl tells me to be true?

It all feels a bit futile and I feel a bit pathetic – especially when I realise I only have 3 months left at College.  Help!

Mind you, time’s not quite so oppressive as I once thought.  Not since my trip last week…

Later:

9.15pm at Blackberry Narrow

‘Street Tuff’ – Rebel MC

That was during rehearsals. 

And the afternoon was even more interesting – just as I was feeling so terminal.

I passed by her and we both said ‘Hi’.  And later, she went to the ‘phones with Sandra.  Jonny passed her and said hello.  Then, on one of our little trips, he and I were asked by Sandra if we had any change for the ‘phone.  I did and I said she could keep it.  As I turned to go, with Mary-Jane watching, I knocked a ‘phone from its hook and then banged the bubble around it with my head as I was replacing it.

I could have died of embarrassment.

Anyway, Jonny and I went on our way, ‘bumping into’ them again later when Sandra insisted on giving me back some of the change she hadn’t used.  She then asked me if I was going to get together with her and Danny Chegwin for a drink sometime soon.  So I said I would give him a ring and check it out.  We all said ‘goodbye’ then.

‘March of the Ents’ – Stephen Oliver

Then, after break, I ran over to the two of them and asked Sandra to ask Cheggers to give me a ring tonite.  She said she would but – ho-ho – she had to take my number.  So I gave it to her, with Mary-Jane standing next to me.

Sandra: Yes and perhaps we could all go for a drink sometime (she gestures at Mary-Jane)?

Ritch: Yeah, sure.

Mary-Jane: Yes, I’m coming along too!  I’ve invited myself.

I grinned, pleased at the level of her commitment to our little game, despite my clumsiness, despite Mickey, etc.

Cheggers hasn’t rung me yet, but I was chuffed by another smile and a ‘Bye’ later in the day.

Roll on, tomorrow.

I think it would be good to get together with Sandra, Cheggers and Fergie.  I want to.  It feels positive.

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1989

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1997

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘The last dance…’

Ritcherd People

‘Queen of Las Vegas’ – The B-52s

I look forward to seeing Mary-Jane tomorrow.

But what do I do?

How do we ensure we live up to each other’s expectations?

Later:

‘Sweat Loaf’ – Butthole Surfers

My favourite people are:

Mary-Jane Ferguson, Danyel ‘Flash’ Gordon, Jonny Badcock, Elliott ‘Elbow’ Barlow, Raquel Stevens, Marita Huckle, Minty from Preston, Maggie, Natalia Wnek, and many others. 

I like Reece Dinsdale, too, but am I allowed to count him?

I had a friend called Lilith MacMillan, but she’s gone and in going has also chosen to sever our contact.  In a way, I am glad.  It was special once and should perhaps always stay special in its bubble, there in the all-too-brief past.

I also had a friend called Stan.  He was the cause of much laughter, but also the cause of equal amounts of annoyance.  But now he’s left College and I shall miss him.  I know it.  I doubt I shall ever see him again.

Other notable people: Amy Neat, Jolene Morse, Kat Hill, Chloe Attenborough, Larry Goodgirl, Julian Ward, Darren Marsh, Spock, Ash, Legs, Nyall Watson, Sally Watson, Donna Davidson (on and off, it seems), my family, etc.

  

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1989

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1994

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘Cheggers and Fergie…’

The Regular Ritcherd Update

‘Room at the Top’ – Adam Ant

Today I went to some pubs in Brandon with Spock and the Commander.

HAYRE RITE NOW

Image to follow...

Later:

‘Thief of Fire’ – Loop

So, DEAR READER, JUST WHO AM I?

Allow me to remind you…

Well, hi.  I’m Ritcherd J. Winterfood.  Often referred to by some as ‘Jez’ [for mysterious reasons now lost within the bowels of time…]

I’m 19 and I’ll be 20 very shortly.  My star sign is Gemini.  I live in a house called BLACKBERRY NARROW in Cambridgeshire and it’s oddly beautiful around here.  In a barren sort of way.  Kind of refreshing, though.

I ‘study’ the Theatre and Performing Arts at NORCAT in Norfolk, and my lecturer tells me that at the rate I’m going, I have pretty much already passed the course with Distinction even though we don’t leave till June…

‘Battle of Pelennor Fields’ – Stephen Oliver

What motivates me?

Loving people: getting to know individuals and discovering their beautiful intricacies; the wonders of love; the joy of thought and imagination; the notion that every moment is unique; music; the stage; hope; friendship; Mary-Jane Ferguson…

I am interested in: DOCTOR WHO, JRR TOLKIEN’S MIDDLE EARTH SAGAS, and loads of other beautiful things.  And I am definitely a SITUATION fan.

What do I like musically?

Hard to define right now.  Lately it’s been a lot of Acid/Dance stuff and some Indie.  But I also like soul-fulfilling things like Kate Bush and, right now, Stephen Oliver’s THE LORD OF THE RINGS soundtrack.

I love life.

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1989

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1988

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1987

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1986

WHAT RITCHERD IS UP TO IN 1985

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character ‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and almost always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]

Next time: ‘Ritcherd people…’